How to be an Awesome Friend (while your friend plans her dream wedding)

 

Whether you’re a bridesmaid, maid of honor, or a friend to a future bride, you know how important the wedding planning phase is and probably want to do everything you can to be a great friend while the bride-to-be envisions and creates her dream wedding. But what does it take to be an awesome friend during this time in the future bride’s life? No matter how long you’ve been friends, now is a great time to take your friendship to the next level, to step up and become the kind of friend the bride will be proud of. Here are some tips on how to do just that.

Don’t let the green-eyed monster take control.

There’s a little dark thing hunched in the corner of our minds, and although it usually stays within the cobwebs, every now and then its eyes turn green and it becomes much bigger than we ever imagined. It’s favorite times to do this? When other people are successful or living the life we want to live, doing things we want to do.

A friend’s wedding can bring up uncomfortable emotions. You see her excited, giddy, and showered with love and praise. She’s in the spotlight. And maybe that hurts a little. Maybe you want to be the girl in love, the girl picking out dresses and cake flavors. Maybe you want to be the girl taking ring selfies and posting to Instagram. And maybe you even feel a little jealous because you’re afraid her groom will take your friend away and everything will change.

Don’t feel too bad; it’s pretty common for people to feel these things, even when it involves people they love and want to see succeed/be happy. The important thing to remember is to not let it take control. If those negative feelings come up, acknowledge them and let them pass like clouds on a windy day. Tell yourself you’re happy for your friend and thankful that you get to be a part of this time in her life. When you realize that you’re not lacking anything in your own life and that everything happens in good time, you’ll be able to show up with a clear head and happy heart.

 

Encourage wedding talk.

So many brides fear becoming a bridezilla that they tiptoe around wedding talk with their friends. The future bride in your life may feel the same way and not want to “bore” you with wedding planning details. And maybe you don’t necessarily want to hear about every little thing she’s doing to plan her dream day, but put that aside for a moment and step into her shoes. Wouldn’t you be excited about this time in your life? Wouldn’t you want to talk to your very best friends about your dream dress and what venue you’re smitten with? Of course you would!

Ask the bride questions about wedding planning, get excited for her, and encourage her to dish the details. She’ll be grateful that you’re willing to lend an ear and maybe even give her some advice on the bridesmaids’ dresses.

This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment for the future bride, so let her gush. Even if you do get bored, realize that it won’t last forever. The wedding planning phase is just a blink in time and surely one that you can get through with a smile on your face.

Respect her wishes.

It’s easy to get wrapped up in your own fantasies when it comes to helping a friend plan a wedding. If you’re a bridesmaid, you might want to pick out your own dress or throw the kind of bridal shower you’d prefer, but let’s get blunt. It’s not about you. If you’re planning the bachelorette party, do it with the bride’s wishes in mind. If you’re wedding dress shopping with the bride, be gentle when offering your opinion. This is her time, so be the awesome friend you are and let her have the final say.

 

Be helpful.

It goes without saying that to be an awesome friend while the bride plans her dream wedding, you must be as helpful as possible. You might not be able to take on every task or change your schedule to fit her needs, but you can offer your assistance and help in any way you can. Doing so will take some stress off of the bride-to-be and will give you a happy boost as well. So help her with her DIY projects or put stamps on a few envelopes. Anything is better than nothing and your friend will be eternally grateful.

Put her at ease.

This is a big one. Although wedding planning has its moments of joy, it can also be nerve wracking. The bride-to-be is probably overwhelmed and maybe even a little nervous about the big day. That’s where you step in. As an awesome friend, you’ll be there to calm her nerves and talk about the things that are stressing her out. You’ll be there to listen to her rant, even if you don’t have any advice to give. You’ll be there to help her out and tick things off the to-do list. And most importantly, you’ll be there to remind her why she’s doing all this wedding planning stuff anyway. Listen, support, and maybe take her for a massage or wine tasting to help her relax.

Being an awesome friend is so much more than just offering your assistance and hosting bridal showers. It’s about love, support, and being there when the bride needs you most. There may be some trying times while your friend plans her dream wedding and your friendship may evolve, but if you stay the course and laugh along the way, your relationship will be much stronger.

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